Now that doesn' t sound like a very tough assignment， until you stop to realize that most of the men in that group were over 35 and were raised in the generation of men that were taught that expressing emotions was not encouraged. Showing feelings or crying was just not done. So this was a very threatening assignment for some.
At the beginning of our next class， I asked if someone wanted to share what happened when they told someone they loved them. I fully expected one of the women to volunteer， as was usually the case， but on this evening one of the men raised his hand. He appeared quite moved and a bit shaken.
As he unfolded out of his chair， he began by saying， "Dennis， I was quite angry with you last week when you gave us this assignment. I didn' t feel that I had anyone to say those words to， and besides， who were you to tell me to do something that personal？ But as I began driving home my conscience started talking to me. It was telling me that I knew exactly who I needed to say 'I love you' to. You see， five years ago， my father and I had a vicious disagreement and really never resolved it since that time. We avoided seeing each other unless we absolutely had to at Christmas or other family gatherings. But even then， we hardly spoke to each other. So， last Tuesday by the time I got home I had convinced myself I was going to tell my father I loved him.
"It' s weird， but just making that decision seemed to lift a heavy load off my chest.
"When I got home， I rushed into the house to tell my wife what I was going to do. She was already in bed， but I woke her up anyway. When I told her， she didn' t just get out of bed， she catapulted out and hugged me， and for the first time in our married life she saw me cry. We stayed up half the night drinking coffee and talking. It was great！
"The next morning I was up bright and early. I was so excited I could hardly sleep. I got to the office early and accomplished more in two hours than I had the whole day before.
"It was 9：00. I called my dad to see if I could come over after work. When he answered the phone， I just said， ' Dad， can I come over after work tonight？ I have something to tell you.' My dad responded with a grumpy， ' For what？' I assured him it wouldn' t take long， so he finany agreed.
"It' s 5：30， I was at my parents' house ringing the doorbell， praying that Dad would answer the door. I was afraid if Mom answered that I would chicken out and tell her instead. But as luck would have it， Dad did answer the door.
"I didn' t waste any time. I took one step in the door and said， 'Dad， I just came over to tell you that I love you.' "It was as if a transformation came over my dad. Before my eyes his face softened， the wrinkles seemed to disappear and he began to cry. He reached out and hugged me and said， 'I love you too， son， but I' ve never been able to say it.'
"It was such a precious moment I didn' t want to move. Mom walked by with tears in her eyes. I just waved and blew her a kiss. Dad and I hugged for a moment longer and then I left. I hadn' t felt that great in a long time.
"But that' s not even my point. Two days after that visit， my dad， who had heart problems， but didn' t tell me， had an attack and ended up in the hospital， unconscious. I don' t know if he' ll make it.
"My message to all of you in this is： Don' t wait to do the things you know need to be done. What if I had waited to tell my dad？ Maybe I will never get the chance again！ Take the time to do what you need to do and do it now！"
我在一個成人班裏教書。最近，我做了一件“不可饒恕”的事情。我給學生們布置了作業，要求他們在下周之內到他們所愛的人家中去，並對他們所愛的人說“我愛你”。他們所要訴說的對象必須是他先前沒有對其說過這三個字的人，或者至少是好長時間沒有說過的。
這些學生都是35歲以上的成年人，而且是受過不鼓勵表達情感教育的一代。在你意識到這些之前，你會認為這項工作聽上去並不難做。然而，在他們先前的教育中，流露情感或落淚都是不可以做的事情，那麽說出這三個字，對於某些人來說，將是一個極其艱巨的任務。
下節課剛一開始，我便詢問是否有願意與大家一起分享一下，在他向所愛的人說出那三個字時發生的故事。我滿心以為會有一位女士願意這樣做，因為這也是以往的慣例。然而，在這個傍晚，卻是一位男士舉起了手。他顯得很激動，甚至有些激動得發抖。
他從椅子上站起來說：“丹尼斯，上個星期你為我們布置這項作業時，我很生你的氣。我覺得我沒有可以訴說‘我愛你' 這三個字的人。而且，你是，憑什麽要求我們做這種私事？但是，當我開車回家的時候，我的良心開始受到譴責。它對我說，我很清楚我需要向說‘我愛你'。要知道，五年前，我與父親發生了爭執，我們的矛盾到現在也沒有真正解決。平日裏我們盡可能避免見麵，除非是在聖誕節或者其他家庭聚會上，我們才迫不得已相見。但是，即便是在那種聚會上，我們也幾乎不與對方說上一句話。所以，到上周二回家的時候，我已經確定自己會對父親說我愛他。
“太神奇了，僅僅是作出了這個決定，就似乎減輕了我胸口處的重壓。
“回到家後，我衝進房間，把準備要做的事情告訴妻子。妻子已經睡下，但是我無論如何還是把她叫醒了。當我把這件事告訴給她的時候，她激動地跳下床，擁抱著我。在我們的婚姻生活中，妻子第一次看到我哭了。大半個夜晚，我們都在邊喝咖啡邊交談著。那種感覺太美妙了！
“第二天早晨，我醒得很早，心情也很不錯。我興奮地簡直無法入睡。我早早地到了辦公室，並用兩個小時的時間做完了比以往一天裏所完成的工作還要多的事情。
“9點鍾的時候，我給父親打了一個電話，詢問下班後我能否過去一趟。父親接電話時，我在電話裏隻是說：‘爸，今天晚上下班後我可不可以過去一趟？我有點兒事情要對您說。' 父親沒好氣地問道：‘有什麽事情啊？' 我向他保證說不會占用他太長時間，他才終於同意。
“下午5點半，我站在了父母的家門前。我一邊按響門鈴，一邊祈禱是父親來開門。我擔心，如果是母親來開門，我會因為膽怯而放棄本的打算，而轉而對她說了那三個字。不過，我很幸運，是父親來開了門。
“我沒有絲毫的猶豫，跨進房門一步便對他說：‘爸，我來就是想告訴您“我愛您”。父親身上似乎發生了一種轉變。眼前的父親臉色變得溫和了，皺紋似乎也不見了，而且哭了起來。他伸出雙臂，將我擁在懷裏說道：‘兒子，我也愛你，但是我從來都沒有說過。’
“那一刻是如此珍貴，我一動也不想動。母親含著淚花走到我們身旁。我隻是朝她揮揮手，給了她一個飛吻。父親和我又擁抱了一會兒後，我離開了。好久沒這麽動情了！
“然而，這並不是我要說的重點。兩天後，父親心髒病突發，在醫院裏不省人事。父親早就有心髒病，但他一直沒有告訴我。我不知道他能否挺過來。
“借著這件事，我想告訴在座的各位：對於你知道需要做的事情，不要一等再等。如果我拖下來，沒有告訴父親我愛他，結果會怎樣？或許我再也沒有機會了。抓緊時間做你要做的事情吧！現在就做！”
父親的等待
A Dance with Dad
佚名 / Anonymous
I am dancing with my father at my parents' 50th-wedding-anniversary celebration. The band is playing an old-fashioned waltz as we move gracefully across the floor. His hand on my waist is as guiding as it always was，and he hums the tune to himself in a steady， youthful way. Around and around we go， laughing and nodding to the other dancers.
We are the best dancers on the floor， they tell us. My father squeezes my hand and smiles at me. All the years that I refused to dance with him melt away now. And those early times come back.